For most, if not all of us, life is inherently challenging enough. Yet, many of us seem to love making things even more complicated by taking it upon ourselves to sabotage our own happiness.
We have plenty to be grateful for, we’ve learned so much from everything that we’ve experienced, and we still have lots ahead of us, yet we choose to dwell on that which seemingly did not or currently isn’t going according to plan.
If you’re unsure whether you’re guilty of making your life seem worse than it actually is, consider these three clear signs that you’re sabotaging your own happiness:1. No One or Thing Is Good Enough for You
Do you love to set expectations for pretty well everything in life? While in some cases the setting of expectations can be both beneficial and even motivating, more often than not, they create a measuring stick that can never be matched.
In these scenarios, pretty well everything that actually transpires, even if it aligns with 80% of what you had hoped for, still seems inferior, since you choose to fixate on the 20% that didn’t measure up rather than appreciating all that it does effectively offer.
The movie 500 Days Of Summer
portrays this form of self-sabotage perfectly in this particular scene:
It’s not being suggested here that you shut off or police the creative aspect of your mind that helps to concoct these expectations, but instead always choose to look at everyone and everything fully.2. Deep Down You’re Afraid of Success
This may sound like complete nonsense, but you’d be surprised by how many of us (even the most goal driven among us) are actually afraid of succeeding. We may not fear the joys, riches, opportunities, and other pleasantries that often come with success, but we do fear a number of the other elements that accompany it, too.
Aspects such as a change in responsibility, the pressure to maintain it, and an increased workload are just three of the more common reasons we don’t actually put all of our energy toward realizing certain goals.
If at some level you don’t actually want something to come into play, you won’t give off the energetic intent necessary to make it a reality.3. You’re Addicted to Complaining and What It Provides
We all have a proficient complainer or two in our life. If you’re honest with yourself, you may discover you are one of them. In this case, you are allowing it to sabotage your happiness.
The most necessary ingredient to an effective complaint is being unsatisfied, and if you allow yourself to become genuinely happy with life, you, of course, will have nothing to complain about.
True happiness certainly sounds more appealing than the opportunity to complain, but it’s something that many of us still elect not to choose because we’ve grown accustomed to the sympathy and attention that we get from others when we do whine about this, that, or the other thing.
Keep in mind that while you may get attention from others when you do complain, the quality of it is likely quite poor. How often do you actually enjoy listening to someone complain? And how genuine is your sympathy for them when it’s your time to respond?
October 23, 2017