The demystification of the taboos in sexuality

The sexuality taboos inhibit the joy of exploring it. Many of us unconsciously are by the power of habits, the slaves of some wrong attitudes towards sex. Unless the effort to change this, there are very little chances to reshape our erotic life.

The tantric vision doesn’t reject anything

Anything that somebody may experience is not judged as being good or bad but as an opportunity to learn something. In Tantra there is not a rigid separation between good or bad, between what is acceptable and what is not. Tantra doesn’t use moral prejudices about our amorous preferences. The point is not what you are doing but how you are doing it. That’s why Tantra can be practiced by anybody.

The tantric vision is unifying, all embracing, because every situation, whether pleasant or not, may be an occasion to discover how we are in fact and how we can amplify our good qualities. And in this respect, the sexuality is a unique, extraordinary chance to integrate all the aspects which feature us, including the ones which we usually reject and hate. This vision also recognizes that inside any adult there is a natural childish aspect, which can innocently and spontaneous explore any unknown territory. Tantra gives pragmatical answers to fundamental questions such as: what the ecstasy is, how it can be reached in the context of amorous intimacy, how this can take place in the actual cultural environment and how it can help us in the everyday life?

The lovemaking doesn’t mean procreation

Many people consider it awkward and restrictive that the lovemaking should uniquely imply procreation and no pleasure at all. This makes some people, every time they feel happy with some erotic sensation, also experience the stupid sense of guilt there. Think for a minute how many times you made love till now. Somebody 43 old told us that he did it 3000 times. But to make a child one single time was enough. Then what did he do in the others 2999 times and why?

The role of Tantra is to fill in the “other times”, showing us how to pass from procreation to ecstasy.

The lovemaking is not a shame

The attitude to condemn the eroticism comes from the wrong tendency to separate the body from spirit. In this vision, the sexuality represents the libido, the instinct which cannot be controlled by the will, and any repression therefore is dangerous according to psychologists. Even today, after the so-called sexual revolution in the 60s, which also echoed in Romania later on, after another revolution, the ’89 one, this bizarre attitude, repressing, generating frustrations and inner conflicts, has a bad influence and shadows our feelings regarding the eroticism. Tantra unveils new ways to accede to the erotic experience, where it is honored as a celebration, as an act of creation, as an art.

The erotic fusion is natural, so don’t block it

The Romanian popular wisdom says: “When I’m hot I’m hot. When I’m not hot, I’m not.” Thus don’t oppose the natural impulse of the libido, let it be. The nature knows the best. Frequently, some men consider that introducing some practices or precise techniques in the sexual life will diminish our spontaneity. Still, the way we manifest nowadays our sexuality is not as “natural” as it may seem. It is strongly influenced by the cultural conditions and by the education. For example, ideas such as: “men would rather go for the blondes”, “the small (or big) breasts are to be preferred” or “the biggest the penis the more satisfying the orgasm”. All these beliefs are definitely influencing our reactions during the sexual experiences.

These thoughts are the result of our culture, not only from the political, sportive or diet points of view, but especially regarding our intimate life. Still, the sexual energy leaves within us both a natural and a cultural trace. Mostly all our erotic answers are simple learned answers. Often we have the tendency to automatically react, based on understandings influenced by our previous experiences, by parental conditionings and by popular beliefs. Tantra teaches us to transform and free the body answers while making love. It is not only a formal practice but also a step towards the real love making. By these techniques you will find out that you can effortlessly fit them into your love life without affecting your spontaneity all the less.

There are no “rules” in making love

A woman said that, after several years she succeeded to have orgasm through auto- eroticism, but the doctor told her this is a bad thing. For many, especially for women, the influence of the “experts” created real “rules” of making love and attaining the pleasure.

Tantra dissolves all these distinctions. There are no wrong ways to live the orgasm or wrong ways to make love. Tantra removes only wrong attitudes and mentalities. It teaches us to trust ourselves and discover our originality regarding the erotic awakening. It teaches us that the orgasm is not only a sexual event but it can comprise also the whole body, mind, heart and spirit.

The orgasm doesn’t mean ejaculation

Many people understand that sex is only limited to the genitals. Somebody who apparently had a consistent erotic experience, accumulated in tens of years, was saying: “After all the sexy movies I watched, with all the vibrators I was using and all the sexual techniques I practiced, my sexual life didn’t enriched too much and didn’t shape a clear sense. It remained as the ejaculation of the seminal liquid into the vagina.” An extremely limited vision, compared to the tantric one.

The erotic act is not merely excitement

Many men think that it is enough to kiss and stimulate for few minutes the woman’s breasts and/or clitoris and she will be immediately ready to make love. Similarly, some women, when kiss and touch the penis of their lover, expect that the erection of “mister always ready” to come in few minutes. As a result of this simplistic mentality sexuality is centered and limited to few “hot” zones.

Tantra shows that all the body, the hands, the hips, the legs, the neck are also liable of unexpected erotic sensations. Any part of our body may become, specifically, almost as hot, sensitive and open as the genitals, and the experiencing of the orgasmic pulsations in these zones may be so fulfilling that the genitals could be forgotten for a while. Tantra shows that being ready for the erotic act is not a matter of physical stimulation, but one of both mental, emotional-affective and spiritual consonance between the lovers who meet each other full of trust, open and creative.

yogaesoteric

Also available in: Română