The Perilous Path Towards Awakening (9)
by Bernhard Guenther
Read the eight part of the article
Coming out of hiding – and being sincere with oneself – can be particularly challenging for people who predominantly live in their heads (caught in the male aspect of consciousness). This personality possesses a strong intellect that has the ability to rationalize and self-justify everything (including crafting a clever exterior persona), especially in relation to the lies stemming from the false personality – it also has a tendency to get trapped in analysis-paralysis, being unable to recognize anything “above/beyond” themselves, i.e. the higher intelligence of the Divine and Spirit.
Caught in overriding thought loops and the rationalizing mind, the door to the Divine is therefore shut – they are cut off within the prison of the monkey mind. The underlying mechanism behind this behaviour is actually unconscious fear, stemming from ego identification. Fear of the loss of control. Fear of surrender to the flow of life/Tao (with the resultant illusory fear of chaos) which is itself based on the fear of nature (the feminine aspect of consciousness) and, essentially, fear of true love and freedom. It also ties into the fear of being “insignificant”, fear of not being “strong” (fear of appearing as “weak”), fear of “not knowing” (and essentially the “unknown”), and fear of how others will perceive us if we’d open up to deeper, authentic expressions of humility and vulnerability.
“A dangerous habit is constant self-justification. When this becomes strong in the seeker, it is impossible to turn him in this part of the being to the right consciousness and action because at each step his whole preoccupation is to justify himself. His mind rushes at once to maintain his own idea, his own position or his own course of action.
This he is ready to do by any kind of argument, sometimes the most clumsy and foolish or inconsistent with what he has been protesting the moment before [but not obvious to him], by any kind of mis-statement or any kind of device. This is a common misuse, but non the less a misuse of the thinking mind; but it takes in him exaggerated proportions and so long as he keeps to it, it will be impossible for him to see or live the Truth.” ~ Sri Aurobindo, The Integral Yoga
“If man does not accept his situation and, in particular, his inner state as it appears to him, thanks to brief illuminations from the consciousness of the real ‘I’— if he is obstinate against all evidence, justifying his Personality by protecting himself behind logic, legitimacy and justice, he will then turn his back on the path of Access, and thrust himself further into the wilderness. Nobody can reach the path of Access to the Way [of union with the Divine], without first passing through an interior bankruptcy; a moral collapse [disillusionment].” ~ Boris Mouravieff, Gnosis
Life as a Catalyst and Teacher
For those of us who keep working on ourselves with sincerity and radical self-honesty – facing the lies we’ve been telling ourselves (stemming from the egotic mind/personality and social/cultural conditioning, augmented by thought injections of the occult hostile forces), realizing the futility of “personal will”, etc. – and as a result have had glimpses into our true nature and birthright which lies hidden behind who we “think” we are, the gifts begin to reveal themselves in weirdly wonderful ways. We start to see, feel and align more and more with the natural flow of life (Divine Will) which is “simpler” than we “think” it is.
As Adyashanti said: “This kind of flow is always available to us, but most of us are too lost in the complexities of our thinking to feel that there’s a simple and natural flow to life. But underneath the turmoil of thought and emotion, and underneath the grasping of the personal will, there is indeed a flow. There is a simple movement of life.”
As a result we also start to simplify our lives and slow down. No longer driven by ambition (with its side effects of competition/comparison), conditioned/vital cravings, the need to “become”, and externally looking for love and happiness, we surrender to the simple movement of life. Compartmentalized, will-full doing and reactivity are replaced by an embodied call-and-response to life itself. At the same time, we don’t avoid life, nor do we see ourselves as better/worse than anyone else. We recognize (on an embodied level) the unity and interrelationship of all that is. It’s not a state of constant “bliss” and “awe”, but rather a sober and grounded state of being, fully embracing life, whatever may come.
We also recognize that life itself is our greatest teacher and catalyst for awakening. No longer mechanically/outwardly projecting our inner fragmentation, we realize the teaching-function of everything in our everyday life. We don’t use “spirituality” to avoid life, nor do we seek out “peak experiences” – we engage in everyday life more fully in the present moment, for that is the real “peak” experience (when we are fully tuned into life on an embodied level). There is no need for “more” than this.
We start to trust life more and more (and as result we trust ourselves more and more as well), not because we expect life or spirit to give us anything we “want”, but because we know that life (as the movement of the Divine) is supporting and helping us to remember ourselves, assisting in our awakening process. We instinctually-comprehend that life and spirit will essentially guide us towards what we “truly want” and need (including lessons we need to learn) from a soul perspective, not based on the ego’s whims, entitlements and conditioned desires.
Interestingly, this surrender (and letting go aspect) is the hardest part for most people to accept, for they don’t like to hear that control is an illusion; they most often equate relinquishing personal will with “defeat” or “failure”, and fear that without taking “control” of their lives, they won’t find happiness, fulfillment, prosperity, etc., or will usher in utter chaos by doing so, all of which is matrix programming lies to keep humanity trapped in this fear-survival frequency.
But nothing could be further from the truth. The surrender/letting go process (in alignment with the awakening/embodiment journey) leads us eventually to true joy, love, contentment, fulfilling relationships; it opens the pathway to our vocation, purpose and calling in life, as well as abundance that can’t be measured in materialistic terms (however, it doesn’t mean you have to be “poor” nor completely reject materialism so as to be “spiritual”, which is another misconception of spirituality). But it also requires faith and trust, stepping out of one’s comfort zone and embracing the unknown and unpredictable. The “counter-arguments” for this process are the voices of the ego or predator mind (occult forces), reinforced by the matrix cult-ure that worships personality over essence. It doesn’t like to give up its reign (and doesn’t give up easily), for it would mean the end of its rule. These thought injections are not stemming from the true “self”/the real “I”.
We then know that any difficulties and challenging situations that may arise are opportunities for a deeper awakening, most often resulting in “shocks” that are necessary to shake us up and yank us out of illusion. Despite these moments of “fierce grace”, we also experience more and more beautiful equanimity and moments of bliss, happiness and joy that don’t depend on any external factors.
We become less afraid of discomfort and the unknown, realizing on a deeper level that life is not about “winning” or “losing”, but all there is are lessons, and that we are being guided and helped at every moment if we can tune into our own magnificence. Consequently, we are getting more in touch with our intuition, our internal guidance, connected to spirit within (and essentially, with Divine Will), all of which are uniquely expressed through us as sovereign embodied soul-integrated individuals. Life then becomes indeed more effort-less, as we don’t try to fight the current of life (Tao), but trust that the river of life carries us where we need to be, and delivers to us what we need to experience, based on our unique soul lessons and talents.
“While we measure our own success in terms of our personal comfort and security, the ‘universe’ measures our success by how much we have learned. So long as we use comfort and security as our criteria for success, we will fear our own intuitive guidance because by its very nature it directs us into new cycles of learning that are sometimes uncomfortable. In developing your skill [of intuition] in your own life, you must trust your gut responses – a fact I cannot emphasize enough.” ~ Caroline Myss
From a bigger picture perspective, this is how we transcend the Matrix as well, even though we still live in this world (since we haven’t gone anywhere physically), but start to experience “reality” and life on a whole different level (“being in this world but not of it”). Essentially, we realize that “heaven” is right here, right now, and always has been within us, even though that impression may sound ignorant, ridiculous or “escapist” to anyone who hasn’t had this experience, and keeps pointing at the shadows on the wall in an effort to prove what he/she perceives as the “real world”.
However, it is far from being anything close to “escapist”, because there is no denial of the “dark” either, in fact there is deeper “seeing” and understanding of “evil” (beyond its 3D manifestation) and its role within the duality of 3D experience, as seen in the light of evolutionary consciousness with all the “different faces of god”. But no words or “arguments” can convince such a person, and there is no need or pressure to do this anyway, since everyone has to realize that for him/herself, an internal realization, for it is beyond language and words.
No one can show it to us or bring it to us. No one is “bailing us” out, no leader, no savior, no authority, until we answer the call of the divine voice within, which lies hidden behind the illusory constructs of personality-identification. It’s a higher state of being, an embodied experience which the mind and intellect cannot come close to comprehending. The differing states of reality-experience which manifest within (and between) human beings during this time of transition is also becoming more and more apparent, and relates to the Timeline-Reality Spilt (explored in a previous essay), for some people reinforce and fall deeper into a dream state (while dreaming to be awake, mistaking reality for illusion and illusion for reality), getting caught up in the Matrix with all the “traps of agreement” laid out by the occult forces. Meanwhile, others start to increasingly (and courageously) wake up to their true nature, becoming conscious transducers of Divine Will as frequency anchors within the unfolding of the “cosmic plan”.
There is also no judgment about these differing journeys, because the “splitting” from a higher perspective also reflects the cosmic equilibrium and the vast difference in soul lessons for each human being to embody in this day and age.
Essentially, every human being is destined to awaken, each in their own “time” and own way (and over lifetimes) as we play out the cosmic drama/comedy. However, we are far away from experiencing any notion of a “collective” awakening in any near “future”. So, embark on the path, watch out for the traps, don’t be afraid of the dark, and most importantly, enjoy the ride. The only way out is through, and there is light at the end of the tunnel… in fact, the tunnel is made of light itself.
“This isn’t a journey about becoming something. This is about unbecoming who we are not, about undeceiving ourselves. And so one of the most important steps is to come into agreement with your life so that you’re not turning away from yourself in any way. And the amazing thing is that when we are no longer turning away from ourselves, we find a great amount of energy, a great capacity for clarity and wisdom, and we start to see everything we need to see.” ~ Adyashanti, The End of Your World
July 30, 2019